I have no doubt

Family is always important than boyfriend, I have no doubt about that. I just don’t want to see and leave my love one suffers without my support.

Lucky one goes first

Sometimes I really wish I could give up current relationship. Not because we have no more love, it is because we are still in love so much.
I could see how much he suffers. My heart sore is getting serious. He tells me that he wants to give up everything.

About 14 months ago, I could feel how happy he was. He used to thank God that we met. He was so proud to friends and relatives that I am a person with disabilities who is doing my Degree Computer Systems Engineering.

I used to think what if my parents leave one day. Would I still carry on my life? Or I would follow them? Mum told me once before “Lucky one goes first.” I also agree with her. And I’d love to go first.

Besides my parents, Kent is the person who I love the most. He loves and protects me, just like my parents. He could scarify everything for me and he never says “NO” to me. I was so happy to meet him. I thought I’d got another person who loves me like my parents do.

Unfortunately, my parents always think that Kent is more important to me. Could I tell my parents that I don’t want to lose anyone of them because I can’t afford to lose them? Could I tell them that Kent is important because I am afraid to lose them in future? I would give up Kent if we don’t love each other anymore or we have problems which are unsolvable.

Yes, I believe that I would survive without a life partner. I don’t mind to be single for rest of my life. Losing Kent and don’t have a life partner are different.

Things are getting worse. My heart sore is getting serious. I pray and ask God to help us to go through this obstacle.

I guess this post may be quite complicated to my blog readers. However, this is what I feel.